Women believe, they know everything about everything. After all, we are the more savvy sex. We seem to know that his missing glasses are in the top drawer in the kitchen beside the yellow pencil. In the same breath, we miss these huge signals from our partner that tell us what they are looking, wanting, and hoping for!
There are VERY FEW mistakes women make, in any room of the house (can I get an AMEN ladies?), but just this one time, I am going to explore the possibility that just maybe, we might not always be bang on when it comes to reading the minds of our male counterparts. From my research, here are the top three mistakes women make in bed.
Make The First Move!
When is the last time you dragged your man by his tie to the bedroom, tore open his shirt and climbed him like a jungle gym? Men love it when the women in their lives make the first move! They want to feel like we are powerless in their presence and our panties fall to the floor when we are near them. Even though men want to be the masculine one in the relationship, after all no one wants to be pussy whipped, they do want the love of their life to be lusting after them.
The very best sex I ever had was when my partner and I had been out for party at a friend’s house. I don’t know what it was about him that night, but he looked so HOT, I just couldn’t keep my eyes off him. I wanted to literally grab him and tear his clothes off in the guest bathroom! I made some lame excuse for us having to leave early. When we arrived home, I grabbed him by the waist of his jeans and pushed him against the fridge. I grabbed his shirt, I pulled his hair. I took charge! We literally had sex right up against the fridge!
It was AH-MAZING!!! I made the first move. I took the initiative to get the sex started. He loved not having to guess whether or not I was in the mood. Men are not mind readers, we all know that. We think we are sending off signals that are clear and concise, but the reality is we don’t always come across that way. Once in a while, it’s good for us to take charge, be the one pursuing and be the one who pulls out the whip first!
Open Your Mouth!
Ladies, we need to give up this crazy idea that good girls don’t make noise. We need to enjoy the sex and make sure our partner knows we are having a good, nay, GREAT time! I am not talking about an Oscar-winning performance here. I am talking about a woman who is truly having fun between the sheets or on the kitchen table as the case may be. Those moans, groans, sighs and OH MY GAWDS are exactly what he wants to hear. This isn’t about lying to him and putting on a performance. It is about giving your partner clues and indications that what he is doing is pleasing to you.
Many men love to hear their partners talk dirty in bed too. He isn’t looking for you to rival the local truck stop lunch hour, he’s listening for you to let go in the moment and to just say what comes to mind. If you need help with the lingo, here is my best suggestion. Watch a steamy movie. Observe your partner. When he leans forward in parts of the movie, pay attention to what they are saying to each other, then adapt it to your style and personality. If you want to just wing it…a well placed “fuck me!” goes a very long way in the bedroom, am I right guys? Remember, no one is an atheist when it comes to GREAT SEX. “OH MY GOD!” is the top phrase shouted out in the bedroom.
Along with opening your mouth in bed, is also the talk about giving head. Yes ladies, blowjobs, hummers, singing to the one-man choir, sucking cock. We are talking penis in mouth here. I learned early on that a great blowjob can and will get you many things from your man, including RECIPROCATION! How many times have you heard women say, he wants it, but won’t give it back? The truth is if you aren’t willing to give it, you probably won’t have much luck getting it back. Try viewing his penis as a mini version of him, you might have an easier time. Think of it this way, he truly is a larger extension of his penis and really, the penis rules the rest of him. So, like it, love it, put a hat on it. Whatever you do, learn to give a toe-curling, mattress gripping blowjob.
Never Underestimate the Power of Panties!
Remember how you felt that last time you put on an outfit that you KNEW you looked incredible in? Remember how your heart beat faster, you had a spring in your step? Now transfer that feeling to what is under your clothes! I am not saying you need to go out and spend hundreds of dollars at the lingerie store. I am saying that you should have something in your undies drawer that makes YOU feel great when you put it on. Men LOVE….hear me here…L.O.V.E. to unwrap the gift that is their woman! When you show a peek of something sexy under your clothing, he is immediately beginning to plan how he is going to get you OUT of it that night. Let him know that you have something fun on under your jeans and t-shirt. Send him a picture on his phone…as long as it’s not a work phone…trust me on THAT one! Stash a pair of panties in his pocket, or briefcase to find later on during the day. Chances are he will not be staying late for the office meeting that night.
So throw away the old, stretched out, stained and torn undies ladies!!! Hit your local big box store and pay a buck a pair if you need to. Choose something that fits well. Remember there is nothing sexy…AT ALL…about picking underwear out of your ass, so be sure to choose underwear that is flattering and fits well. Then gift wrap your body, not only for your partner but for you as well. You are an incredible creature. Why not gift wrap that up with something that makes you feel as spectacular as you are? Go, right now and find something that makes you feel amazing! I guarantee you, you won’t regret it!